Fragments from books that don’t exist: The Pompous Tree


Eerdwogh had a nose for such things. He could sniff out trouble from miles away. This was the main reason why Detective Leppy Job kept him on the payroll; that and the fact that the mutt was good enough company during those long, lonely nights staking out his teenage daughter’s prospective prom dates. The only problem was how the dog had to go a lot, and in this neighborhood the residents were not too keen on poodle poo. It seemed every yard had posted a sign to ward off the natural functions. Each sign was more ingenious than the next, as if it were a competition. Leppy didn’t care for this jurisdiction. He often wished they’d never left the city, but the wife, and the kid, and of course the schools, always the schools, not to mention the self-driving-car-bombs. City life was never the same after those things came along. Now it was boonies for life, whether you liked it or not. The ROI on tactical terror was not nearly as high where the population was so much less congealed.


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